What is Your Focus?

Recently a friend relayed this experience:

She was visiting her sibling and enjoys his company very much.  However, there were many other family members to visit and some of them display inappropriate behavior, and have done so for years.  She told me that nothing has changed over the years and by the time she was leaving to go home from an otherwise enjoyable visit, she was sick to her stomach.

When I think about her report of her entire visit, I would say about eighty percent of her visit was great, yet the disturbing experiences are overshadowing the positive experiences.  I venture to say, this is pretty typical of the human condition. 

In my book, I have a few suggestions that can help:

• I always begin with centering techniques while the situation is going on, but many of us get so caught up in the moment that we forget to take care of ourselves.
  

 If that has happened, I would suggest the following:

• It is helpful to review what happened so you can gain some insight. Some questions to ask might be: “What could I have done differently?” “Is there another way to look at the situation?” While reviewing and experience, don’t neglect the fact that there might have been some uplifting moments as well, no matter how insignificant. While the sweet, small events we engaged in are often overshadowed by our upsetting memories, make sure you include them in your review, and then move forward. Even forgiveness is a choice.
  

It is empowering to realize that you have the ability to shift your perspective.  This review is for you, so go out and enjoy your day—with no indigestion!

Let me know in the comments below how this can apply to your situation.  Are you able to change your focus to the positive experiences or do you get stuck?

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