perceptions Archives - Custom Calm

Emotions: Do You Have Them or Do They Have You?

Posted by Ellen Sichel on December 1, 2011

“When you feel yourself in the grip of an emotion such as jealousy or anger or sorrow…take a step back…You can allow the emotion to run through you without causing negative thoughts or actions.” Gary Zukov

Emotions are part of human nature and they meant to be felt. The problem arises when we hold onto emotions and become them.

We express how we feel as “I am angry or I am sad”, rather than “I feel angry or I feel sad”. There is a marked difference between the two. If you are the emotion, then you have taken on the emotion live in reaction, rather than feeling it and moving on.

When you take a step back and view the situation without layering your emotions and perceptions, then the emotion no longer will have a grip on you.

You can see with greater clarity and bring yourself back to the here and now.

Let me know in the comments below what your experience has been. Are you able to take a step back from your emotions, or do you get caught up in them?

Tags: anger, clarity, emotions, here and now, perceptions, sadness, thoughts

Posted in: A Calm Perspective

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Trick or Treat? Find out in 5 Steps.

Posted by Ellen Sichel on October 31, 2011

When I hear the phrase trick or treat, it reminds me of how we are often the mind plays tricks on us.

We see through the filters from our personal history, clouding what is really in front of us. Our reactions and decisions are based on this information.

It takes practice to really see what is happening beyond the stories of the mind and when we can do this, we can live with more clarity and ease.

Give this a try:

Look at an unusual object
Say what your immediate perception of the object is (it might remind you of something).
Now, take a look at the object from all angles.
Report what you see without any opinions- just report what is actually in front of you.
Notice what the difference was in your original report and what is actually in front of you.

Let me know in the comments below what you noticed. Was your original report different? How do you think you can use this in your daily life?

Tags: clarity, ease, mind, opinions, perceptions, reaction

Posted in: Technique of the Week

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Stuck in our Behavior

Posted by Ellen Sichel on October 6, 2011

Definition of Insanity: Doing the same thing over and over again, expecting different results.

If we are hammering something and we continue to smack our hand, we would change how we are hammering, or would we???

In our relationships we do the same thing. Our approach may not get the results we are wanting, yet we continue to employ them. It is difficult to change how and what we do, even when it hurts us and others. This seems to be human nature, and it is not effective.

What happens is our mind gets stuck in our own perceptions of how things should be, leaving no room for other possibilities. It becomes a good, bad, right or wrong judgment and we perpetuate our behavior.

When we are able to quite our minds we can take a step back and see with more clarity. Only then do we have a choice to be open and receptive to other options.

Are you stuck in insanity in your life? Let me know in the comments below.

Tags: behavior, choice, clarity, insanity, mind, options, perceptions

Posted in: A Calm Perspective

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5 Steps to an Attitude of Gratitude

Posted by Ellen Sichel on May 27, 2011

"I thank God for my handicaps, for through them I have found myself, my work and my God" – Helen Keller

Helen Keller had unimaginable obstacles to overcome in her life, and her attitude is inspiring.

Gratitude for the challenges in life is difficult for many of us to understand. We tend to look at the things that have been painful having a negative impact on us. Everything we experience in life impacts who we become and our day to day living.

Many of the most inspiring people in our lives had to endure major hurdles.

Try this:

Take a moment and think about something that was difficult for you to overcome.
Notice the event without imposing any judgments or emotional charge. Simply look at it as an observer.
Now with the same observation, look at how you live your life now.
Find one thing about yourself that might not have emerged if the early event did not happen.
Take a few breaths, focusing on that awareness.

When you do this exploration invite your mind to remain in the moment, and you can gain some insight into the positive gifts you received and how it shaped your perceptions, activities, spiritual path, and relationships.

Let me know in the comments below what you discovered. If you could not think of anything, let me know what got in the way.

Tags: gratitude, insight, lifes challanges, mind, moment, perceptions, relationships, spiritual path

Posted in: A Calm Perspective

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