loss Archives - Custom Calm

Celebrate Memorial Day

Posted by Ellen Sichel on May 23, 2012

Memorial Day, for many it is an opportunity to enjoy in a long weekend. Retailers use it for an occasion for sales. It marks the onset of summer and we take time to play and socialize. I am one who likes any chance to relax, enjoy myself and cannot resist a bargain.

Yet, Memorial Day did not begin with this intention. It was originally known as Decoration Day and it began an occasion to honor Union soldiers who had died during the Civil War. After World War I, it was extended to include all men and women.

For many of us war and loss are part of reality. We raise the flag and visit our loved ones at the cemetery. I have been traveling lately and when I get off the plane I see the USO greeting these young soldiers and the surrounding travelers clapping and thanking those who serve. I feel an upwelling of gratitude and awe at the courage it takes to serve our country.

On Monday, take a few moments and reflect on the cost of war. This is not a political statement but a human experience of love, gratitude and inner peace.

Let me know in the comments below about your Memorial Day thoughts.

Tags: gratitude, inner peace, loss, love

Posted in: A Calm Perspective

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You Are More Than Your Labels

Posted by Ellen Sichel on February 25, 2011

Visualize an iceberg. The tip is the only part you are able to see and on it are all the things you see yourself to be: maybe a parent, child, employee, friend, cancer patient, southerner, mother, father and so on… The tip of the iceberg is covered with all of your identities. Consider: What happens when you lose one of your identities? Maybe you lose your job, or your child gets married, or something else changes the way you identify yourself. When this happens, there is a notable loss, and at times, an emptiness. What we have forgotten is how to take a look beneath the water’s surface. What will we find there? A vast iceberg. It is massive – unimaginably so. And, if you only focus on the very tip – on identity markers – you will miss out on the enormity of who you are. You are much more than your body, your mind and your identities. When we can quiet our minds, even for a moment, we can see that we are so much more than we ever imagined. What do you consider yourself to be beyond the tip of the iceberg? Please share in the comments below.